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AnjaAll the way from school through university I hated the first day. Why? You were required to introduce yourself to everyone in class. As an introvert that is like telling a twenty-something beauty queen she’ll probably age prematurely and develop a bunch of crow’s feet because she spends too much time at the tanning salon.

I would constantly try to make something up because I was always afraid I’d look like a bore to everyone, y’know, like I was an international spy or that I had climbed the Himalaya, but before I could say anything, my face would get bright red like a raw tomato and I would just sink into my notebook and hide from the rest of the world for the semester.

Yep. Being an introvert is hard and exhausting work.

So writing an “About Me” page is pretty much torturous. I hate talking about myself, like, who am I? I still haven’t figured it out entirely. I’m not Madonna, I can’t wander through the world with just one name, can I? I’m certainly no fashion blogger nor a model -that’s just a job I wouldn’t be able to have as I refuse to have my picture taken, so you’ll rarely see selfies from me. Be thankful about that. It’s Anja, by the way.

Since I was little I’ve been always able to keep busy by myself. I don’t suffer the I-can’t-be-alone-at-all disease, which, I guess, annoys a few people because I get reprimanded for spending too much time with myself and too little socializing… but… but… there’s so much fabric and yarn and… and… you won’t understand until you sit in front of a sewing machine or grab a pair of needles and this feeling of being a productive entity fills you up and mends your broken soul.

But here we go: I went to school (hated it), went to university (that wasn’t so bad) and afterwards I pretended being the graphic designer that my degree said I was. It didn’t last too long; doing custom work is not my thing. I made a stop at a radio station and hosted a few programs while also publishing a magazine. I heard it got on MTV. I didn’t.

Then I thought I’d be a writer, like Anne Rice, and write about vampires, but Stephenie Meyer killed my career ambitions. My vampires refused to sparkle, they were too dark and damaged to always wear glitter. I don’t blame them.

After that I purchased a Singer with a discount coupon because I figured I would need one to mend my clothes someday but soon discovered the many things you could sew with it: pillow cases (done!), tiny bags (done!), big bags (done!), even neckties for cats (super done!) and clothes! (Um… that’s still a work in progress…). Knitting, crocheting and embroidery are the logical conclusion to my crafty endeavors. I don’t do mod podge, that’s just messy.

As seen on BuzzfeedAnd this is where this weird lunatic, who loves her cats more than she will probably ever love people, is now: sewing, printing mugs, drawing mandalas, driving the Mr. crazy with her introvert antics in hopes of turning into a self-sufficient entrepreneur (Huh? Why am I suddenly talking about myself in the third person?). I have an Etsy store, btw, just in case you need a mug to drink that early Monday morning coffee you crave so much or you are in dire need of some stress relief. No, no, I don’t sell magic pills just some cool coloring pages that won’t criticize you if you color outside the lines.

Some things you may not know about me, and you probably don’t care to know:

I dislike social gatherings, after a few hours of non-stop small talk all I hear is the voice of Charlie Brown’s teacher. It usually takes me two days to recover (hello Internet, my lovely friend!).

All I ever wanted was a Ballerina Barbie. In her pink tutu… no, not really, but you get extra points if you know who said that.

My favorite football team in the world is Borussia Dortmund. I do my best to never, ever miss a match even if it means I have to drag my grumpy self in front of the TV on Saturday mornings.

“Bad Blood” is my all time favorite episode from The X-Files… and yes, I still have a crush on Mulder.

(You’re still here? I admire your persistence).

I watched “The Lost Boys” close to twenty times in my youth and it probably is my most watched movie. I still know all the dialogue.

I only listen to “The Phantom of the Opera” when I’m on a deadline and stressed because it calms me down. I don’t care for it so much the rest of the time, when I prefer listening to NIN, The Mission and Placebo.

I anxiously await the arrival of Halloween and the Day of the Dead, my most beloved holidays of the year. Yes, I am THAT weird.

I DON’T like traveling by car when someone else is at the wheel. I get extremely anxious, curl myself into a ball and cry all the way to wherever it is I am going. I guess I have control issues, or so I’ve been told. Too bad there are no trains.

People in the Spanish-speaking world never know how to pronounce my name. After many, many years of correcting them, I have finally stopped because they never get it right. If you’re curious on how to pronounce it, go here.

My mother probably doesn’t know it and she would scold me if she found out that I can swear like a sailor. Whoops, but y’ know, they say that: People who curse a lot have better vocabularies than those who don’t. F*ck, yeah!

(You made it! Have a cookie.)

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